A Matter of Time
by LED
Summary: After living in New York for two years, Rachel is ready to give up on auditioning.


At the sound of the apartment door opening, Puck looked up from his spot on the couch to see Rachel walk in, grocery bags in each hand. "Hey."

"Hey! I remembered we needed a few things so I stopped in at Trader Joe's on my way home. I got those cookies that you like," she said walking into the kitchen and setting down the bags.

"Thanks," he said, standing up and going to stand in the kitchen doorway. "Jason called a little while ago," he said, referring to a mutual friend from college who had just gotten married and bought a house in Westchester. As the first of their group of friends to get married, Jason had been the subject of merciless teasing which had only escalated after he moved to suburbia. "He and Mel want to have everyone over tomorrow for dinner. He says they're tired of having to come into the city to hang out so they want everyone to go to them. Probably should have thought about that before moving to the middle of nowhere. Anyway, maybe we can take the Metro North up tomorrow around 5? Your audition is in the morning, right?"

"Sounds great!" she said, unpacking a bag of apples. "I've been wanting to see their house now that it's set up. We haven't seen it since we helped them move in. Anyway, I'm not going to the audition tomorrow, so I'm free all day."

"Why aren't you going to the audition?"

"I've just decided not to go," she stated. "I want to take some time off from auditioning to reevaluate my options and decide whether or not I should continue to pursue a career in the theater."

"What?" Puck exclaimed incredulously. "What do you mean, y_ou don't want to 'pursue a career in the theater?'"_

"I said that I want to think about it. I just want to consider my options," Rachel said dismissively, drawing a carton of soymilk from the grocery bag and heading towards the refrigerator. "Oh, and I ran into Jesse St. James today," Rachel continued, ignoring his shock and segueing into another topic of conversation.

"Who?" Puck asked, still caught off guard by her earlier announcement. "Wait, that jerk you dated in high school?"

"Yes. I ran into him when I was walking out of dance class this morning and –"

"Don't think that you're getting off about the not auditioning thing."

She rolled her eyes. "As I was saying," she continued pointedly, "I ran into him after dance and we both had a few minutes free so we stopped in at Starbucks. It turns out that he's been living in the city for a few years. He moved here after graduation and is dating this girl he met at UCLA. She's in her last year at NYU law. Anyway, it turns out that there's another revival of West Side Story opening this spring and he's in rehearsals to play Riff. I told him I'd try to see it when it opens."

Although her tone of voice had not changed, Puck saw a flicker of something flash through her eyes. Suddenly, things were starting to make sense. "Is that what this is about? You ran into him and found out that he's going to be in a show and now you want to give up on auditioning?"

"My decision has nothing to do with Jesse."

He gave her a look. "Right, so you just decided – out of the blue – that you don't want to audition anymore?"

"I said that I just want to think about it!" she exclaimed, running a hand through her hair in frustration. It was a look he knew well.

"Because all of a sudden, you need to think about whether or not you want to sing – even though it's all you've ever thought about doing? Even though you've been talking about being on Broadway since … well, since fucking ever."

"Look. I'm not saying that I don't love singing – because I do. I'm not saying that I wouldn't love to get a part on Broadway. It's just that I need to start thinking about whether or not this is a viable option for me. And maybe running into Jesse did have something to do with my decision, but all it did was make me think about this sooner. I would have come to it on my own, eventually, but running into him just made me realize that I've been at this for two years already, Noah. Maybe it's time for me to start reevaluating my options and my decisions."

"Two years isn't that long. Rachel, you know you have the talent. Just because you haven't gotten a part yet, doesn't mean that it'll never happen."

"Stop."

"Rachel."

"I just…" she paused and took a breath. "It's just that I've worked so hard and all my life everyone's always told me that I'm good. And even when people hated me, they still _respected_ me. They thought that I had talent. But that was Lima, and this is New York, and … it's been two years! It's been two years, and what do I have to show for it? Nothing. I've gone on audition after audition and I still haven't gotten an actual part. I don't know, maybe I'm just not cut out for this. Maybe I should –"

"That's bullshit," he said succinctly. "Welcome to the real world. You think that everything's going to just fall into place when you want it to, because you want it to? Sorry, but life's not that easy. It's a lesson that everyone has to learn sooner or later. So it's been two years and you still haven't gotten a part, and yeah, maybe that asshole did. So what? Just because things get hard, doesn't mean you can just roll over and give up. Fuck that. What about all those actresses you always talk about who had someone tell them that they were never going to make it? They didn't give up. You are amazing, Rachel. And you also happen to be the most annoyingly persistent person I've ever met. So you know what? You are going to go to that audition tomorrow, and you are going to sing your ass off. It's going to happen, Rachel. If there was ever anyone who should be on Broadway, it's you. It might not be easy, but it's going to happen."

"But –"

"Shut up. It'll happen."

Her eyes were still suspiciously watery, but he could see the corners of her mouth twitch slightly.

The next day, she did exactly what he said. She went in and sang. She probably sang better than she ever had before. She put everything she had into the performance. She didn't get the part.

Four months, and countless auditions later, Noah walked into the apartment after work one Friday, wanting nothing more than to collapse on the couch and not move again until Monday morning. Instead he was assaulted by the sound of the RENT soundtrack blasting and the sight of Rachel dancing around the apartment with a dust cloth in one hand and a spray bottle of environmentally friendly cleaner in the other. Her back was to him and her hips swayed as she wiped off a table. Due to her proximity to the blasting speaker, she probably had not heard him yet. "Hey," he said, stepping up behind her.

She let out a shriek and turned to face him. "You scared me," she gasped and reached over to turn down the music. "When did you come in?"

"Just now. Great show by the way," he said reaching out to put his hands on her hips and draw her towards him. "What do you do for an encore?"

She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, tilting her face up to kiss him. Pulling back slightly, she met his eyes and bit her lower lip, unable to keep the sides of her mouth from tilting up. "I got it."

His eyes widened. "Really?" An uncontrollable grin of his own spread across his face.

She nodded. "I finally got it, Noah. I got the part."

"God, I'm so proud of you. Is this the part where I get to say 'I told you so'?"

Rachel laughed, her eyes sparkling with uncontrollable joy. "Thank you – for not letting me quit – thank you."

"Baby, I knew it was going to happen. It was just a matter of time."


End file.
